Oops, That Didn’t Work as Expected! After Biden and His Fellow America Haters Cancel Dr. Seuss Sales Skyrocket

Oops, That Didn’t Work as Expected! After Biden and His Fellow America Haters Cancel Dr. Seuss Sales Skyrocket

At 6:30 PM Eastern time yesterday, more than half of the chart will still be dominated by Dr. Seuss books. The only top-ranked book that wasn’t from Dr. Seuss was written by Sistah Souljah, proving that we are living in the most bizarre simulation of all time. This phenomenon was taking place at Barnes and Noble as well.

Sistah tops their best sellers list at the moment, while the rest of the list is made up of Dr. Seuss books. This whole brouhaha is being referred to as a cancellation but that’s not entirely accurate. The company decided to take this step in a proactive manner and they were not forced to do so by the online outrage mob.

We are now left to wonder: was this an amazing marketing gimmick or did they really care about racism? In the meantime, they have created quite the feeding frenzy. If this was done on purpose, we are pretty impressed. Forbes has documented what took place here and they seem to have a certain level of skepticism about the true intentions.

“A day after the announcement of the cancellation, nine of the top 10 books on Amazon’s best-selling charts were by Dr. Seuss, though none were the six controversial titles. Those books are now much harder to get, and their prices on the secondary market have skyrocketed.

On rare book site AbeBooks, first editions of And To Think That I Saw It on Mulberry Street are going for up to $9,000, while If I Ran the Zoo is selling for $8,200. At Barnes & Noble, both titles are already out of stock. Rare and children’s bookstores, which typically get calls about The Cat in the Hat or How the Grinch Stole Christmas, have been handling increased requests for the six nixed titles.

“Fielding those calls was basically our entire day yesterday,” says Marissa Acey, a manager at New York City’s Book Culture. The store only had one copy of If I Ran the Zoo, she added, explaining that none of the titles listed were popular enough to keep in stock.

“We spent the whole day yesterday on the phone answering calls about Dr. Seuss,” adds Peter Glassman, the owner of New York City’s fabled children’s bookstore Books of Wonder,” says Forbes.

Some might think that only the newly forbidden books are being purchased but that’s not what is happening here. People are buying up the classic titles like they can’t obtain “Green Eggs and Ham” at their local library any time that they want. The cancellation panic has caused many to fret over whether their local librarian will join in.

Whether the books are being purchased by angry conservatives or concerned parents who want to preserve their childhood memories, now is the perfect time to own the liberals. “It’s just 10AM and Fox News has already had 8 segments on Dr. Seuss “quite literally being canceled” [Narrator: He wasn’t],” tweeted one smart aleck about the news coverage. Fox News was not about to miss their chance to get in on the fun, however.

The conservative leaning outlets were always going to have a field day with all of this. The publishers who are raking in all of this money from Dr. Seuss need to give Fox a thank you for helping to spread the word. Consumer magic was made this week and we are just glad that we are privileged enough to see it in action. We won’t be surprised if there are more “cancellations” like this one in the future, that is for sure.


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